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Dignified Pauper
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Location: Ed's Technicolor Nightmare
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Default [p] - more garbage

Another entry. Disregard this linear spacing. The actual version has many indentations and what-not.


MAY 20th 4:49 AM

Rain, overcast, the past week
storms pushed through
I'm reminded of a farmhouse
a town a city familiarity
on an old porch swing my grandfather hums
My good frend Jordan cries
through every storm I smile
tell her "everything will be okay"
tell her "everything is okay"

Tonight, the sky is clear
rain move on towards Philly
Jersey and D.C. and onwards
over the vast blue deep
carrying a girls memories
pouring them onto the ground
buried
pouring them into the sea
drowned

***

I say I have much work to accomplish
the truth is I have much work to accomplish
I read a tremendous deal
much of which I despise
admittingly skimming through
I simply lack discipline in the skill and art

I work at a desk manu nights for many hours
handing out spare keys and vacuums
ping-pong paddles, and other random
items to supply a college student with activity

You said "I don't need alcohol to have fun"
said that "I have fun without drinking"
I do need alcohol
I like to drink for fun
Alcoholism is an excuse for bad behavior

***

Professors are smug
high class and pretentious, armed with knowledge
Captain, my Captain my D was well deserved
believe me, I will write something better.

English and cannons, unjust cannons
picked by living white men picking
exclusive dead white men
Chaucer Milton Donne Dickens
my lover, where were you on the list?
contemporary is not classic
classic is not cannon
believe me, I will write something better.

Last edited by Dignified Pauper; 05-21-2006 at 09:21 AM.
Old 05-20-2006, 11:32 AM
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Based on personal experience, eh? Is this all one poem or a set of poems?

I like the third one the best - man, English professors are pretentious pricks. I totally sympathize with that. It sums up frustration and anger towards an archaic system really well. Yeah, that one rocks.

The second one seems more like a terse diary crammed into verse than a poem, though. I dunno what else to say, other than the second one isn't that great. 'accomplish' is a weird word and ending two lines in a row is like an immediate turn off.

The first one is pretty cool - I like the idea of the storm carrying someone away. You know, you can display indentations and stuff by using   to space out your entries appropriately and then use Preview Post.
Old 05-21-2006, 11:57 AM
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Dignified Pauper
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Originally Posted by Neel Hates Clout's Guts
Based on personal experience, eh? Is this all one poem or a set of poems?

I like the third one the best - man, English professors are pretentious pricks. I totally sympathize with that. It sums up frustration and anger towards an archaic system really well. Yeah, that one rocks.

The second one seems more like a terse diary crammed into verse than a poem, though. I dunno what else to say, other than the second one isn't that great. 'accomplish' is a weird word and ending two lines in a row is like an immediate turn off.

The first one is pretty cool - I like the idea of the storm carrying someone away. You know, you can display indentations and stuff by using   to space out your entries appropriately and then use Preview Post.

Like I know how that works.


Actually, all of these are a set of experimental things that I am going to put into one large poem because they all are in a sense the same. The over-all collection of things anyways, individually they stand as well.

The only reason I like the second one is because of the first two lines and the last stanza. It's part of my social satire.
Old 05-21-2006, 06:38 PM
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Yeah, I like that
         last stanza too.
Old 05-22-2006, 07:30 AM
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