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Thread: Truths of Work.

  1. #1
    The flying homo! Recognized Member Giga Guess's Avatar
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    Default Truths of Work.

    17. There is no "I" in "teamwork." But there is in "management kiss-up."

    16. If you do a good job and work hard, you may get a job with a better company someday.

    15. The light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off due to budget cuts.

    14. Doing a job RIGHT the first time gets the job done. Doing the job WRONG 14 times gives you job security.

    13. If you think we're a bad company, you should see the competition.

    12. Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings--they did it by killing all those who oppose them.

    11. We put the "k" in "kwality."

    10. Two days without a human rights violation.

    9. Your job is STILL better than asking, "You want fries with that?"

    8. We build great products when we feel like it and don't have any reason to call in sick.

    7. If at first you don't succeed, try management.

    6. Teamwork means never having to take all the blame yourself.

    5. The beatings will continue until morale improves.

    4. Pride, Commitment, Teamwork. Words we use to get you to work for free.

    3. If at first you don't succeed, delegate it.

    2. Plagiarism saves time.

    1. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

    Many thanks Christmas!
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  2. #2
    Banned Hawkeye's Avatar
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    If I may:

    18. 'Teamwork' is what the employees do what the boss tells them to do.

  3. #3
    Not a Banana Mo-Nercy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Giga Guess
    9. Your job is STILL better than asking, "You want fries with that?"
    That IS my job

  4. #4
    Old-Ones Studios Cruise Control's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mo-Nercy
    Quote Originally Posted by Giga Guess
    9. Your job is STILL better than asking, "You want fries with that?"
    That IS my job
    Pwned.
    Leave some shards under the belly
    Lay some grease inside my hand
    It's a sentimental jury
    And the makings of a good plan

  5. #5
    Will be banned again Roto13's Avatar
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    Giga Guess reads posters at work. News at 11.

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    Banned ~SapphireStar~'s Avatar
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    1. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
    Oh I love it.

  7. #7
    sly gypsy Recognized Member Levian's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Giga Guess
    12. Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings--they did it by killing all those who oppose them.
    Rome did not create a great empire because it's a city ffs.


  8. #8
    Banned Sylvie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Levian
    Quote Originally Posted by Giga Guess
    12. Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings--they did it by killing all those who oppose them.
    Rome did not create a great empire because it's a city ffs.
    pwned.

  9. #9
    The flying homo! Recognized Member Giga Guess's Avatar
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    IT WAS AN AMUSING E-MAIL I GOT, AND I FELT I SHOULD SHARE! SO BLOODY WELL BE NICE!

    [EDIT] Ooops...I didn't mean to come off as a jerk there....add to the end of that.
    Last edited by Giga Guess; 06-17-2006 at 01:41 AM.

    Many thanks Christmas!
    Horniest Member, 2007! Gimme a little unf unf!

  10. #10
    sly gypsy Recognized Member Levian's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Giga Guess
    IT WAS AN AMUSING E-MAIL I GOT, AND I FELT I SHOULD SHARE! SO BLOODY WELL BE NICE!
    Woah, hold it there. You don't share amusing e-mails. You return them to their sender and sign them up for whale porn.


  11. #11
    The flying homo! Recognized Member Giga Guess's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Levian
    Quote Originally Posted by Giga Guess
    IT WAS AN AMUSING E-MAIL I GOT, AND I FELT I SHOULD SHARE! SO BLOODY WELL BE NICE!
    Woah, hold it there. You don't share amusing e-mails. You return them to their sender and sign them up for whale porn.
    But I like amusing e-mails...

    Many thanks Christmas!
    Horniest Member, 2007! Gimme a little unf unf!

  12. #12
    Will be banned again Roto13's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Giga Guess
    Quote Originally Posted by Levian
    Quote Originally Posted by Giga Guess
    IT WAS AN AMUSING E-MAIL I GOT, AND I FELT I SHOULD SHARE! SO BLOODY WELL BE NICE!
    Woah, hold it there. You don't share amusing e-mails. You return them to their sender and sign them up for whale porn.
    But I like amusing e-mails whale porn...

  13. #13
    My hair is soft. G SpOtZ's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by roto13-ness
    Quote Originally Posted by Giga Guess
    Quote Originally Posted by Levian
    Quote Originally Posted by Giga Guess
    IT WAS AN AMUSING E-MAIL I GOT, AND I FELT I SHOULD SHARE! SO BLOODY WELL BE NICE!
    Woah, hold it there. You don't share amusing e-mails. You return them to their sender and sign them up for whale porn.
    But I like amusing e-mails whale porn...
    Nahahahaha...haha..haaaa...ahh. Yeah. That's funny.

    Thank you Hysterian!

  14. #14
    is very female. Recognized Member Daryl's Avatar
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    11. We put the "k" in "kwality."
    That one made me crack up. Aah, the crazy hilarity found in truth.

  15. #15
    The Nerd Who Knows Pant Leg Eater from the Bad World's Avatar
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    Aww. Number one has been in my signature for so long and no one noticed it 'till it was here...

    <PaperStar> live fast, die young, bad plefs do it well

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