Eyes on Final Fantasy Forums > The World Is Square...and Enix > Heart (and Body) of the Kingdom of Kingdom Hearts > Things KH Characters Would Never Say

[OneWingedAngelSephiroth91]

YRP: Time to go!!
Bumps into Berserker
Yuna: Hey, move your fat @$$ out of the...
The Berserker turns around.
Yuna: Uh.... I didn't mean it... I swear!!!
Paine: But I did. Move your fat @$$ out of the way you stupid fat @$$!
Rikku: Uhhh... did that make sence? Ouch! My head hurts from thinking.
Sora then stabs through Berserker. and turns around to see his friends.
Paine: Hey you! move your skinny @$$ out of our way!
Yuna: You know what Paine? Sometimes you can be a real pain!!
Sora turns around and chases them off with his Keyblade. Doing as we say: "Swatting at flies!"

[Dragonface]

~ When Sora&co first meet YRP ~

Goofy: So who are you? *huk* *huk* *huk*
Yuna: My name is Yuna.
Paine: ...Paine.
Rikku: And I'm Rikku.
Sora: Riku? *Look closer at Rikku* OMFG! RIKU! YOU BECAME A GIRL! WHAT HAPPEN?
Yuna:
Paine: o.O *Look at Rikku* Rikku, did you used to be a guy?
Rikku: I NEVER MEET HIM BEFORE AT ALL!
Donald: Wait a minute, what do you mean 'before'?
Rikku: I still a girl the whole time beside I DID have sex with him before...
Sora: WHAT!?! THE ONLY PERSION THAT HAVE SEX WITH ME IS KAIRI...
Rikku: Thats true, BUT you keeped on calling ME Kairi when I didn't told you my REAL name!
Sora: WHAT!?! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, wait a minutes...THAT WAS THE BEST SEX I EVER HAVE!
Rikku: And the funny thing is...
Sora: I remember that the first sex I had is two years ago, with a blonde haired girl, at first it was Kairi when she had dye her hair, but...
Rikku: That WAS me.
Goofy, Donald, Yuna & Paine: o.O
*Elsewhere*
Riku: And I though this coundn't get any bader than before, I'm dead wrong. I don't want to be found because not only that I look like Xehanort's heartless but also now Sora THINKS I'M A GIRL!!!!!! I want to die. KILL ME GOD, KILL ME!!!!!!!!!!

~ Outside of Ansem the wise's bedroom ~

Mickey: I wonder if the REAL Ansem is behind that door...*Open the door...* o.O
Real Ansem: *Stop Praying Pictures of Mickey* Hi friend, he he he...this is not what its look.
Mickey: I think you need help, and I know who can.
Real Ansem: NOT DR. PHIL, ANYONE BUT HIM!!!!!!!!!!!K

~ Before fight with Sephiroth ~

Sephiroth: Wheres Cloud?
Sora: Get out of here, I want to fight someone else.
Sephiroth: WHAT!?! I'm sure you want to fight a mamma's boy like me? Or a clown like Kefka, or a cross dresser like Kuja?
Kefka&Kuja: WHAT!?!
*Sephiroth, Kefka and Kuja are fighting eachother*
Sora: *Eating his popcorn* At lest I don't have to fight all three of them...
*Cloud shows up*
Cloud: THERE YOU ARE...um...I think I'll just go srew with Seph's Mom.* Gone off to find Sephiroth's mother*
Sora: I can't wait...*Gone off to also find Sephiroth's mother*

[arcanedude34]

Cloud: Sephiroth!
Sephiroth: Karen? Is that you?
Cloud: Huh...?
Sephiroth: Take that back about my mama!
Cloud: Are you... drunk?
Sephiroth: LOLOLOLOL... You're alright, Cloud.
Cloud: Ummm...
Seohiroth: Hey Cloud wanna hear a secret?
Cloud: ...
Spehiroth: Tifa's hawt.
Cloud: ...
Sephiroth: Wanna hear another secret?
Cloud: ...
Sephiroth: YOUR MOM!
Sora: Cloud? Is Sephiroth drunk?
Cloud: I think so.
Goofy: Is that what it's like to be drunk? I'm never gonna drink again a-hyuk.
Cloud: ...
Sephiroth: *naked* IM STREAKING!! W00T!
Cloud:
Sora:
Goofy:
Tifa:
Donald:

(Ohh, yeah. Donald likes it ^^)

[Dragonface]

~ At TWTNW, meeting room ~

Xemnas: Ok everynoone settel down.
Axel: What is this meet about THIS time?
Marluxia: I'm the lowest member here...*crying*...Axel burn my petties...
Axel: Quit it fag boy, pinky boy, girly man, homo...
Xemnas: SHUT UP! Now as your wondering why we're here right? *All other Nobodies nod* Good, now read the TODAYS newspaper. It says "Is the Organization the bad guys or gay guys?" We need a way to stop this from getting around?
Axel: I can think of three members that are gay. 1) He sing like a girl [Demyx]. 2) He act like a girl [Marluxia]. 3) His name can reput as 'Mansex' [Xemnas].
Demyx: I have an idea!
Xemnas: What the idea is?
Demyx: Get a REAL FEMALE NOBODY to become out member.
Xemnas: Thats...not a bad idea at all, infact its the first 'good' idea you can come up with.
Demyx: THANKS SIR!!!!
Xemnas: Don't push you luck...

* A week later, Xemnas' room*

Saïx: Oh great one...
Xemnas: Drop the 'great one' line, now what do you want.
Saïx: ...I found our new soon-to-be member...
Xemnas: Tell him to piss off...
Saïx: ...Her name is Larxene.
Xemnas: I don't AND can't care about...wait a minute...you said 'Her'? As in a FEMALE?
Saïx: ...Yup.
Xemnas: ...Well?
Saïx: Well what?
Xemnas: What are you waiting for? welcome our new member and show her around, I'll tell every other Nobodies that we finally got a FIRST FEMALE MEMBER!
Saïx: What are you talking about?
Xemnas: Were you at the meeting last week?
Saïx: No, I was out to pay the bills thanks to Luxord.
*Outside Xemnas' room*
Larxene: WHAT HAVE I GOT MYSELF INTO THIS TIME?

[Clawsze]

(In TWtNW kitchen)

Xemnas: Okay....since Axel burned our old table we are having to use a air hockey table...
Xaldin:..air means wind doesn't it?(somehow turns the table on with his wind powers)
Demyx:....Hey Roxas, pass the sauce.
Roxas:Here(slides sauce bottle to Demyx)
Demyx: (covered in Ketchup)YOU LEFT IT OPEN!!!!DANCE WATER DANCE!!(the rest of the sauce flys towards Roxas, missing barely)
Xigbar:...Demyx...(loads guns)
Demyx: Crap...
Roxas:Phew...
Axel: Must.....say....it....FOOD FIGHT!!!

20 minutes later.

Xemnas: After todays...incedent there shall be a ban on ANY thing which isn't a table, but can be used as one.
Xaldin:NNNOOOO, not the air hockey table....(grabs lances).....Roxas.....Axel....Demyx..... go.....stabbity.....STABBITY!!!!

[dragontamer]

[Albel]

In TWtNW

Roxas:Hey, Axel. Do you want to see a really cool move that I learnt.
Axel: Do I have too?
Roxas:Yeah, its cool *The keyblade appears in my hand and starts vibrating fast* See, ts cool.
Axel:Man, thats sucks ass.
Larxene: *runs up to Roxas and Axel* Errmm..can I borrow that, mine broke *She grabs his keyblade and runs off*
Roxas & Axel:

[Dragonface]

[The UFO]

~ in TWTNW, Meeting room ~

Xemnas: Settel down...
*All other Nobodies still talking*
Xemnas: SHUT UP OR I'LL KICK YOUR a$$...?
*Larxene walk in, puke on Saïx's hair and sit down in her seat*
Xemnas: What happen THIS time Larxene? Drinking?
Larxene:...UFO...Anal...Probing...
*All other Nobodies thinks Larxene is joking*
Larxene: ...Carry...Alien...Baby...
All other Nobodies: o.O
Xemnas: ROXAS, GO FIND YOUR OTHER AND BRING HIM HERE! AND RIKU!
Roxas: Fine *Starts going for a hunt for Sora and Riku*

~ Elsewhere, Deep Space (when you are not on any world) ~

Alien1: Have you plant my seeds in her? *Point to a picuter of Larxene*
Alien2: Yes brother, soon she'll give birth to your child.
Alien1: Ofcorse my dear sisther.
Alien1&2: HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!

[Xehanort(Heartless) or Xemnas(Nobody)?]

~ In TWTNW, Axel's room ~

Axel: Got 7?
Demyx: Fish.
Roxas: Fish.
Larxene: Fish.
Naminé: Here. *About to pass card '7' to Axel when...*
Xemnas? (Intercom): When I call for out next meeting, every Nobodies must be there as...NUDE...as wearing nothing...Thats same goes for you Naminé...that is all for now...
Axel: Is it me or he's getting even more nutter?
~ Xemnas' Room ~
Xehanort: Thoese fools, they don't know what hit them, MAAA HA HA HA *Leave the room, Xemnas just came in his room*
Xemnas: I got to tell every Nobodies about this *Turn the intercom*
~ Back to Axel's Room ~
Xemnas: ALL NOBODIES MUST GO TO THE MEETING ROOM NOW!
Axel: We better do what he said...
~ 5 Minutes later, in the Meeting room ~
Xemnas:*Just came in* Ok I need to...um...why are you Nobodies are wearing...nothing?
Zexion: ...Because you said so.
Xemnas: ...?