Eyes on Final Fantasy Forums > The World Is Square...and Enix > Heart (and Body) of the Kingdom of Kingdom Hearts > Things KH Characters Would Never Say

[Axel_girl]

Axel:I'm leaving the organization!
Larxene: No Axel Don't!!!!
Xemnas: Hey! I'm the leader here! I give the commands!
Axel:...Ok! I'm leaving!!!! L-E-A-V-I-N-G, got it memorised?
Larxene: Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo ! Plz don't!!! I must confess sth....
Axel:....Well.... What??? W-H-A-T, got it memorised?
Xemnas: (eating pop corn).... keep going....
Larxene: Axel, I love youuuuuu!!!!!
Axel:And....?
Xemnas: (talking to himself: That could be a great film!) DEMYX, COME HERE NOW!!!!!!!!!!
Demyx: (running) What's up, boss?
Xemnas: I told you NOT to call me that!
Demyx:Sorry, boss.... You wanted sth?
Xemnas: ... Whatever! Play something romantic... NOW!

Back to Axel and Larxene

Axel: HEY! Are you going to say anything else or not..?!! N-O-T, got it memorised?
Larxene:.....I.....am.... well... pre-.... PREGNANT!!!!
Axel:WHAAAAAAAAT????????????????????!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Larxene:P-R-E-G-N-A-N-T! Got it memorised???
Axel: (thinking: Hey! That's my quote!)........
Larxene:So?

In the meantime the whole organisation has gathered up, watching the scene...

Xemnas: LOUDER the music, Demyx! (The popcorn is tastefull, or that movie could win ALL the OSCARS????)
Demyx:Ok, boss!!! (OMG it's so touching... Axel will become a father... I WANT, TOO!)
Xemnas :
Axel:Well... Then.... I.... guess... that... (singing) I WILL BECOME A FATHER! I WILL BECOME A FATHER! I WILL BECOME A FATHER! I WILL BECOME A FATHER! F-A-T-H-E-R, Got it memorised????? Got it memorised????? Got it memorised?????
Larxene:........... (Why did I tell him?....?)

Riku and Sora break in….!

Sora: Where’s Kairi??????
Riku: We know that she’s here!!!
Sora: That Axel, kidnapped her!!!!!

Noone notice them….

Sora: Riku?
Riku: Yeah…
Sora: Do you see, what I see?
Riku: I think…. So….

Axel is down on his knees, rubbing Larxene’s belly…

Axel: Sora! Riku! Welcome, my friends!
Sora: Are you serious….?
Riku: We are ENEMIES, you know….
Axel: That’s past! Join my happiness! (singing) I WILL BECOME A FATHER! I WILL BECOME A FATHER! I WILL BECOME A FATHER! I WILL BECOME A FATHER!!!!!!!!!!
Sora, Riku: Hah????

Axel goes to Larxene…

Axel: (Very serious) We have to decide for something…
Larxene: Ok… What?
Axel: We have to decide on a name for our kid…
Larxene: I suggest…
Axel: Brilliant idea!!!
Larxene: !!!!!!!!??????!!!!!!
Axel: If it’s a boy Oxilver and if it’s a girl Xafy! Really bRRRRRilliant idea!
Larxene: Oxilver???? What kind of name is that?
Axel: An excellent one!
Larxene: I don’t like it!
Axel: I don’t care! I like it! Otherwise I’m leaving!!!!!!!
Larxene: ….. ok….. (Oxilver….? Whatever… Poor child….)
Xemnas: (singing) I LIKE IT! I LIKE IT! I LIKE IT! I LIKE IT! I LIKE IT! I LIKE IT! I LIKE IT! If I sell this scenario to Hollywood, I’ll get rich! Really rich! I won’t have to gather hearts, anymore!
Demyx: Can I stop playing now, boss?
Xemnas: I swear to God that if you call me boss again, I'll kill you!!!! Keep playing!
Demyx: Ok.... Sorry............. boss!
Xemnas: ......

While Xemnas is driven mad by Demyx, Kairi smashes the door...

Sora: Kairi!!! (running towards her)
Kairi: I love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Sora: Me too! (really happy!)
Kairi: Axel, I love you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (She ignores Sora and falls into Axel's hug!)
Sora:What????
Axel: Hah?
Kairi: From the first time I saw you, I felt sth in my stomach....
Sora: Please, let it be that she was hungry......
Kairi: I think I'm in love with you!!!!!!
Axel: Hah??? What's wrong with you people?????
Sora: Kairi!!!
Kairi: Shut up, you idiot! Don't you see that I'm talking with Axel???
Sora: Riku.... say something....
Riku: I won't tell that I told you, but I did!
Sora: Nice friend... Thanks a lot....
Axel: I know that I'm the most handsome guy in the whole planet (or the universe maybe???)... And you Kairi, are very beautifull, too.... I think, I can't resist....
Kairi: I knew it! Kiss me!
Sora:
Riku:
Larxene:
Axel: Ok, baby! B-A-B-Y, got it memorised? (Axel gives sloppy kisses to Kairi)
Riku:
Larxene: I'm sick of all these nonsense! Axel? I'm not pregnant! I told that so you wouldn't leave, but now I don't care!!! GO TO HELL WITH YOUR KAIRI!!!!
Axel: OHHHH! I forgot the baby.... WHAT????????????????? (faints...)
Larxene: AXEL??? MY AXEL???? Are you okay? (Kairi comes close) And you Kairi, GET AWAY !!!! Axel....? I lied.... I was kidding.... Of course I am pregnant! Open your eyes, now! Your beautiful emerald green eyes... PLEASEEEEEEE! AXEL......... If I tell you that there is a 99,9% possibility for our child to have the same red spiky hair, would you STAND UP NOW?????
Axel: What???? Really!!!! Larxene? My Larxene, I LOVE YOU!!!! Kairi means nothing to me! I swear to God....
Kairi: Sora? I love YOU!
Sora: I don't, now!!!!
Riku:
Kairi:
Sora: Oh, plz don't look at me like that....
Kairi:
Sora: Ok, ok, ok.... I love you, too!
Kairi: (thinking: yes! I found someone to spend my time! )

And in the end....

Axel: Larxene, will you marry me????
Larxene: Yes! YES! YES!
Axel: I love you!
Larxene: Me too!
Axel: I love Oxilver, too!
Larxene: (Here we go again.....)
THE END
Xemnas: It couldn't be better!!!!! I'M RICH! I'M RICH! I'M RICH! I'M RICH! I'M RICH! I'M RICH! Hollywood, here I come!!!!!!! Demyx, bring beers to celebrate! This film will be the best ever!!! I'll be famous! I'll get all the OSCARS and maybe the SCENARIO-NOBEL,too!!!!
Demyx: I'm playing the guitar, I can't go for beers, boss!
Xemnas: Bring them NOW or you are DEAD!!!!!
Demyx: Ok, without "boss"!!!
Xemnas: (after Demyx brought the beers) Cheers !!!!

Cast: Axel, Xemnas, Larxene, Demyx, Riku, Sora, Kairi and... THE BABY!!!!

[master axel]

kari:sora your hot

[Angie_Leonhart]

(After Namine and Kairi escape the prison in Organisation's hideout and find Riku.)

Namine:You can take it from Here... Riku..
Kairi: What!?!? Riku!?!?! You were Here all Along and didn't cross your mind to save me?!?!?!
Riku: But.. I was...
Kairi: Excuses!!! (Riku: ) Sora Travelled all these Disney Worlds twice to save me (Riku: thinking... ) and you were here and didn't even tried!!!
Riku: Enough!!! Wait for Sora! I'm leaving! (To himself ->Though I doubt we will stand staying with you more than I did...)

(During their talk)

Namine:

Riku Leaves

Namine: Very bright Kairi! How are we going to leave now???

(Hope you liked it... My first message in this forum...)

[Ozmoid]

Riku: If i grow my hair reeealy long, i can cosplay as sephiroth! Then people will think i'm cool![Sorry to all cosplayers out there, but i just think it's stupid for over 13's]

Seifer: We are the discplinary commitee! Raijin, Fuijin and,for no apparent reason, Vivi, form the better game that followed ours!

Sora: Cloud! Sephiroth has returned to life, for a 4th/5th time!
Cloud: That's it! if i can't kill him with several hundred sword wounds, i'll have to do this old skool!
Sora: Then...can i..
Cloud: No, i already said donald could be the DM.

[Aeondo]

Sora: FINALLY! I got 10 thousand munny! flippen sweet!
Goofy:Hey, Sora, look what I got
shoves a pile of elven bandanas at sora
Sora: Goofy....how much did this cost?
Goofy:uhhh Gwarsh maybe about 9000
Sora:goofy you frikin idiot. I can synthesize 1000 divine bandanas for free
sora is now in final form for the first time with a murdurous look in his eye. Sora charges and in 10 seconds flat goofy is unconsous,with stars floating above his head
Donald:Sora!!! SCREW YOU!!! Ive been wanting to levitate for years now and with a sudden flash of light,its impossible for you to touch the ground for the next 5 min!?!?!
I narrorate alot here goes-donald and sora argue over this sudden mishap and they hear "here we go" they look and goofy is now consious again.....donald casts blizzaga and goofy is now encased in a block of ice. Sora hi fives donald and they walk away as if nothing happened

[Jessweeee♪]

XDDDDD

[Crimson]

(during kingdom hearts jus before battle with ansem at the end)

Ansem: Kingdom hearts...return to fartness

SDG: Wha???

Director: CUT!

*director walks in and shoots ansem*

Director: in union actors

Riku: whos gonna play ansem now???

*director shoots riku too*

Sora: now whos gonna play riku?!

Director: ahhhh we dont need a riku (since square are asking me too much money to use the name of that rikku girl for our riku )

Director: anyways....

*at kingdom hearts try outs for the part of ansem*

Zell: so you have come all this way and u still do not get it- thats not right is it

Director: NEXT!

Kefka: i have joined with the darkness- oh now thats just gross!

Director: NEXT!

Quina: ahem, ive come to see the door to this world

Director: it, youll do

[Frozen Phantom]

(some time during KH1-2 (i dont care and it doesnt matter))

Sora: hey donald
donald: yeah?
Sora: its werid thats theres soo many heartless i mean come on is everyone in this world evil...
Donald: well if everyone had the IQ to vote accept kind mickey as our king, i guess the world really is full of evil

*meanwhile at disney castle*

mickey:*sitting on lazy-boy and drinking a beer*
*royal guard enters room*
royal guard:sire a large number of heartless are heading towards the castle...what is your plan of action
mickey: ugh....can you ask me this after the game...just get sora to do it.
royal guard: *cough*jackass*cough*
mickey: i heard that....
royal guard: gulp

*back at sora and the others*

sora:yep....the worlds really are full of dumbasses and villans

(i know it sucks....its like 2am and i had an idea....WTF ARE YOU DOING WITH THAT CHAINSAW...AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

*we are experencing techincal difficulties*

(*covered in flesh wounds and blood* ugh....im done for tonight...next time im bring a f**king ak-47)