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#41  Dear diary, My life hit an utter low today. Nothing matters. I could be sleeping in a ditch, being raped, beaten up, limbless, angry, sad, upset, hurt, choked, or stabbed and it just wouldn't matter. I just don't care anymore. I hate people and i'm too lazy to do anything..i wish i could just sleep all day. I was thinking of going homeless just so i never have to do anything or deal with people ever..*still ponders* |
05-16-2002, 12:31 AM
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 | ::Pats DH:: Dear Journal, Everything is going CRAZY! I had a fight at my friend's house and we assaulted each other with plastic baseball bats! IT was sooo much fun! And then I realized, wait, AP Chem Exam and I'm not ready!! Shoot me now! Hoping for sweet, sweet release, Lightning_Demon |
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05-16-2002, 12:39 AM
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 | Insert sentiment to inanimate object here, Let's act so immature that they will surely not be able to resist fighting!!!! ..........and if that doesn't work we could always simmer the heart, gizzard and neck from chicken or turkey in seasoned water 1 to 2 hours or until tender and add the liver the last 5 to 15 minutes of cooking and then drain giblets; chop and add with the remaining ingredients. Anyhoo, I am going to Anime Expo this July!!! Yay! I will also be entering a local cosplay contest!!! Fun fun fun! Daniel from AOA has soft hair and I am short. Well........man I am boring! Kay-Chan Note to Thorn: I am NOT Mr.Peepers |
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05-17-2002, 03:53 AM
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 |  Thursday, May 16, 2002 - 9:58 PM Diary, Our boys in blue did it again! The Leafs were able to overcome all the odds and beat the Hurricanes in games one of the division final! Go Leafs Go! Saw my brother's apartment yesterday; it's not bad, guess he's lucky he found it for such an amazing price. I just wish he would treat the parents with a little more respect. Booked my G2 Exit roadtest for Thursday, May 23 at 9:10 AM. I really don't think that will be a problem to pass so ya. Guess that's about it for tonight! Leafs are going to take the cup this year! Oh ya, I bought a Leafs flag yesterday and I had it on my car when I was driving today! |
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05-17-2002, 04:06 AM
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| Banned | Dear journal, I have decided it is time for me to restart life once again. I will be locking myself in my room for 72 hours of japanese study. I haven't worked out in a week or so, and after this weekend, i will begin again monday. It's time to be serious. |
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05-17-2002, 05:00 PM
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| | Am I alone? I am crazy. For months and months I have been unable to get over my boyfriend of two and a half years. I have been pathetically unable to function. I cry a lot and have a tendency to be reclusive. I think that everyone hates me and that I have nothing to live for. He has already had two other girlfriends since we broke up. I feel like I was nothing to him for those two years because he won't even talk to me anymore. I feel worthless and abandoned and unloved. I feel out of control, like I can't even control my own mind, like I'm not even alive anymore. I go into these crazy trances where I can't stop crying and I wake up later covered in blood because the inly way I can get myself to stop crying is to cut myself with razor blades.  I don't know what to do. I'm afraid one day I'll never wake up; yet the idea of not feeling anymore is strangely relaxing. Anyhow, I hope anyone with similar problems realizes they're not alone, because these are the times when you feel the most alone. Here's a poem:Pain With open arms I accept it readily, Holding the pain, my gift, my pleasure. The pain forewarns, I drag it heavily. My pretty pain, my only treasure. You give it freely I accept anything from you, My beautiful god of love and pain. I give my love, you give it back Transformed into my lovely pain, My beautiful gift. Holding the pain in my heart, Cradling it. Galvanizing it in my evil, For an evil like me deserves only pain. I accept the pain you generously bestow On me, a creature so low, The pain that is my ultimate present. So I keep it, my precious pain. I drag the razors across my skin And let the pain sink in. I am so evil, pain is my pleasure, My only treasure. |
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05-18-2002, 06:58 AM
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