Make sure you have a proper introduction, it draws in the reader. Also, don't tend to jumble a string of facts together, try to interlink all these facts, also add a bit of your personal opinion and knowledge on the issue. Use more quotes, and support it with concrete evidence. Just for nitpicking sake, maybe straighten up your grammar and use more commas when relevant, for example; "During 1642, Civil war broke out in England. However, it is hard to say why exactly, due to there being many possible reasons: (name reasons) " |